1. You have aluminum foil over your bedroom windows.
2. You can tell how cold it is outside by the frost on the inside walls
3. When you have fly 550 miles in a Boeing 737 just to go to Wal-Mart
4. If you refer to a trip to the “Lower 48” as going “Outside”.
5. If you cannot imagine life without duct tape.
6. If you consider a blue tarp as an essential survival item.
7. If you’ve ever been refused service because a company says it doesn’t “ship outside of the United States”.
8. When you use your frequent flier miles to go school shopping.
9. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes get filled with snow.
10. You know that the term "Break Up" has more to do with the weather than personal relationships.
11. You know that a honey bucket really is a bucket, but it's not really full of honey.
12. If you like spam on your Sailor Boy crackers.
13. you know what Sailor boy crackers are.
(Bonus) 14. The police report is all about dogs, bears, and drunks.