...and apparently I missed mine.
I try not to moan and complain about things on this blog. I realize that you are all hear to look at photos and read things about Alaska and the arctic, not listen to me moan about my bad hair day, or the fact that my son can't ever remember to take out the trash. But sometimes that is the price you have to pay for hanging out here.
I have pretty much come to the conclusion that Algebra was invented by the devil for the torment of all mankind. Seriously. On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays I have a math class. Instead of being in a classroom it is on the computer using a program called Elive. It is audio and visual in real time, so you can hear the instructor speak and can see him write on the whiteboard. Students can also write on the whiteboard and send the instructor private or public instant messages.
Last night my algebra class was AWFUL! It has this amazing ability to make me feel like a complete idiot. The saddest thing about it is that this is only PRE algebra! It only gets worse from here. The other day a friend of mine was complaining on Facebook that her math class was so boring that she was almost falling asleep. Man, I wish I had that problem.
My math class moves so fast that the hour and forty minutes goes by in a whirlwind of confusion. The instructor tells me he doesn't know why I am in such a tizzy when I have one of the highest grades in the class....HUH? I have one of the highest grades in the class? Good grief, my poor classmates. I'm barely hanging on by a thread, what does that mean for them. By the time the class is over I look like this.........
Yes, I understand that my major problem is that I have absolutely no confidence in my math ability. The stuff scares the crap out of me. I will think that I have it down in class and when I go to do the homework I am a mess. I can only compare it with a phobia...like a fear of heights. I say to myself "Cathy, you will not be scared of the escalator at the 5th Avenue Mall!" It doesn't work. I still can't ride up or down the damn thing. It scares the crap out of me every time.
A couple years ago I tried taking this same pre algebra course as paper based distance course. Basically you get a math book and a work book and a list of assignments and you are supposed to teach yourself to do it. Hahahaha. There was NO WAY that was going to happen with me. I am the type of person who has to be shown several times, then do it myself, then be shown a few more times, then do it some more before I finally get it. I was really hoping that having access to an instructor would make it easier for me to figure this stuff out. In a way it is, but the sheer terror....still there.
And guess what! It get's worse! This math class isn’t even the class I need to complete my degree requirements. It’s only PRE Algebra, DEVM 050! Next semester I have to take Algebra DEVM 060, and then I have to take Intermediate Algebra, DEVM 105, which is the actual course that fulfills my degree requirements. What REALLY ticks me off is that NEVER have I ever needed to do, in my every day life, the stuff I am learning in this class. Never. My adult life has not been impaired one iota by not being able to solve anything that resembles this.......
And this, so I hear, is just the easy stuff. Never in my career doing case management and crisis intervention for individuals with developmental disabilities have I have had the need for solve for n. NEVER! So it burns my butt that I even have to suffer throughthis in the first place.
Sooooo, I apologize if the blog has been lacking lately. In the past I have always tried to post every day, but lately I just haven’t been able to manage it. Working full time and having class 4 days a week in the evening is sucking all the ambition out of me. On top of that we are starting to enter the dark season here in the arctic so there will be less photos taken outdoors. Such is the ebb and flow of the blog. I'll hang in there if you guys do.
On a happy note, I really appreciated all the birthday wishes yesterday. Thanks a bunch!